Issue April 1, 2015



McConnell promises to be “less grinchy” Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell has pledged to be “less grinchy” for the remainder of President Obama’s presidency. The Senator made the pledge at a press briefing at the Capitol on Tuesday. The impromptu pledge came after a Senate Appropriations Committee meeting on Indolence Readiness, and was unusually frank … Continued


Local man upset because he heard a Forecastle headliner on the radio Nathaniel Harper-Lee, a 27-year-old freelance satirical cartoonist and urban turkey farmer, is “irate” — and intends to start a hashtag boycott campaign after the Apple store returns his MacBook Air — because he “knows for a fact” that all four Forecastle headliners have … Continued

Music – b-sides

Cahoots bathroom becomes self-aware, starts grunge band After a freak accident last Saturday, sources have confirmed that the men’s bathroom at Cahoots has become self-aware, with the intention of starting a throwback grunge act. Formed from the congealed remains of too many bad decisions and brought to life by the supernatural combination of lightning, chemicals … Continued

Dining – Food

Dustin Staggers announces new 
restaurant concept based on bologna Louisville celebrity chef and restaurateur Dustin Staggers, whose concepts include Roux, Rumplings, Ten Tables and the forthcoming “America. The Diner.” — all of which have sprung up within the past year — announced this week he’ll open yet another concept this summer. The new concept follows … Continued

Dining – Bar

4th Street Live goes local 4th Street Live is apparently tired of being the drunk, handsy uncle that no one invites over for the holidays; the gaudy smear of neon shame that permeates all of downtown with its stink … is going local! “We’re tired of being on the outside looking in of the burgeoning … Continued

Video Tapeworm

THIS WEEKS TWIN PEEKS: FRASIER: THE COMPLETE SERIES 1993; $105.98-129.98; UR A welcome more-economical repackaging of the world’s greatest sitcom spinoff. Kelsey Grammar created the character of Dr. Frasier Crane, pompous, erudite psychiatrist and rival for the affections of waitress Diane (Shelly Long) on “Cheers” in 1992, and few expected him to be little more … Continued


<‘merica> Enjoy Religious Freedom Indiana Anytime Looking to exercise some religious freedom this weekend? Look no farther than the Hoosier state, wherein the governor recently signed into law the Religious Freedom Restoration Act. Just pack a lunch, load the family (even pets!) into the car, and drive across the river – doesn’t matter if you’re … Continued

Plugged In (Apr 1 – April 7)

WED April 1st Bird Recital Hall: University Woodwind Chamber Ensembles; 7 p.m. Comstock Concert Hall: Matthew Nelson, Greg Byrne; 8 p.m. Diamond Pub (St. Matthews): Sean Hickey; 10 p.m. Gerstle’s Place: Kimmet & Doug; 9 p.m. Stevie Rays Blues Bar: Blues and Greys; 8:30 p.m. Third Street Dive: Open Mic with Vulcan Logic Tim Faulkner … Continued

The Kentucky Wildcat is a pussy

OK, I want to just state right off the bat that I am basically an easygoing kind of bird. Go along and get along is my motto. Ask anybody and they will tell you I am totally chill and always willing to greet everyone with a friendly chirp and a spare centipede if I have … Continued

The Fourth Estate

We are so honored here at LEO to have esteemed Senator McConnell gracing the cover of our annual Fake Issue. We just couldn’t think of anyone more deserving. What with all his power and influence and, yet, here he is on our cover promising to quit breaking bad with old meanie you-know-who. Talk about making … Continued

Inbox – April 1, 2015

Why are You AntiSemitic? Dear Jew-hating editor, I find it disgusting that you disrespect your own father’s heritage the way you have. After the years of beautiful columns he wrote about you on Father’s Day, you have the audacity to question the Jewish prophet Bibi — or “Netanyahu” as you self-deprecating Marxist Jews that I … Continued