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We’re all Russians now, mate.

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Because taxpayers here, by default, including me and you, are investors in what’s now a joint venture between the state of Kentucky and Rusal, a company controlled by a Russian oligarch who happens to be a mate of both Vladimir Putin and noted lag Paul Manafort. I expect Oleg Deripaska got a better deal than Kentucky taxpayers, but since that’s information that Bevin won’t share with the people who funded it we might never know. And, contrary to what I’m sure Bevin thinks, taking $200 million from Rusal makes the Braidy boondoggle infinitely more shady than it was before and even less likely to succeed.

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You don’t have to be Warren Buffett to suss out that it’s a deal struck from a weak position. Rusal put up a tenth of the full investment required and got 40 percent of the equity. In itself not unusual, since a large chunk will be funded by debt. But they’ve still got to find another $1.2 billion to fully fund it. Partnering with someone named directly in the Mueller Report and who may be mentioned in sanctions again at some point makes finding quality investors harder, not easier. It’s like going to a respectable bank and saying “Can I borrow millions to build a casino? I’ve already got Donald Trump on board.” Legit investors will run for the hills.

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Yes mate, a clear sign of desperation: Exchanging almost half the company for a tenth of the required dosh to someone who’s very likely under continued and extremely close scrutiny by the Feds. Not a good idea unless you’ve totally run out of options. It obviously wasn’t going well when Braidy started buying up golf courses and housing estates — without a serious injection of cash I’d bet the whole thing was going tits up. You can go back to talking Mockney now, by the way. You’ve made your point.

What a tedious wanker you are. Anyway, it’ll all come out in the end. It always does. If Bevin’s on the take, or his mates are in on it, or if Kentucky taxpayers really are being stitched up, it’ll come out. I’d bet your life on it. My faith in the good guys is almost restored.

Well, aren’t you a bundle of joy for once. Why do you reckon?

I think a lot of people are upset by what’s been going on in D.C., but I took great delight in watching Trump’s hand-picked AG utterly debase himself an hour before letting the cat out the bag. Has there been a dumber self-own in all history? If there has been I can’t think of it. So there’ve been a few reasons to be cheerful.

I’m not the first to say this, but all his acolytes and toadies debase themselves eventually. Trump’s one clear gift is finding people who have deep faults in their personalities and then prying them open until they become gaping, mortal wounds. At that point they’re completely under his control.

Not a new insight, for sure, but worth repeating. Although now that I give it five seconds’ thought I have mixed feelings about the Mueller Report. It makes me think about what I detest about Democrats.

Why would the Mueller Report make you think about why you hate Democrats?

Because if the boot were on the other foot and this was a Republican House we’d be at the Senate conviction stage of impeachment months ago. They’d have impeached without giving a moment’s thought. The GOP doesn’t give a shit about public opinion. They do what the base wants, which is why it only took a hundred votes to start un-peeling Obamacare. They go back to their carnivorous supporters and say look, we did what you wanted: fuck common sense and wise policy, here’s your red meat. Meanwhile Democrats clutch at their pearls and don’t impeach the most impeachable man who could ever be president.

Fair point.

More provincially, I’ve also taken great joy at Thomas Massie and Andy Barr both making total pillocks of themselves. Massie in particular, who can never resist telling people that he went to MIT while simultaneously challenging Louie Gohmert for the title of Dumbest Member of Congress.

Hard to think of a more pointless member of Congress than the Don Quixote of the Bluegrass, although in the Making a Cock of Yourself Stakes, Barr — Andy not Bill this time — has really tested him over the last couple of weeks. If there’s one thing they should’ve learnt by now, it’s that agree with her or not, AOC will burn you if you take her lightly.

They’ll never learn. I mean Maxine Waters has been ripping their still-beating hearts out of their chests for years and they still dismiss her out of hand. Like Don Jr., they’re all too thick to understand.

Speaking of our little town, there’s a momentous couple of weeks coming up for Louisville. The Derby and Fischer’s budget in quick succession.

There’s a link, I suppose, in that one’s about the exploitation of a load of hard-working used and abused that don’t know any better — and who’re ultimately going to end up fed to the dogs — and the other’s horse racing. Not that it’s Fischer’s fault, mind.

Not at all. If anyone should be sent to the knacker’s yard it’s the Metro Council.

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Exactly! •

This article appears in April 24, 2019.