Caravan to bring a cocaine paradise of ISIS gone wild

Nov 7, 2018 at 10:02 am

So what sort of cowardly bullshit are the chuds screaming about now? Well, if you’re a fuckin’ brain-dead chud, you’re probably filling your Depends with crippling Denny’s-based diarrhea out of fear that a caravan, south of the border, made up of so few people it barely matches the attendance of a Ja Rule concert, is about to invade the United States and completely transform Jesus-eagle-freedom-land into a cocaine paradise of ISIS gone wild, and pregnant Honduras ladies eating up all the white man’s pickles and Cheez Whiz, for free!

So, they’re sending in the troops, shadowed by a bunch of militias made up of old racist dullards with gray Hulkamania mustaches to compound this non-problem all because the MAGA chuds have been whipped into a frothy fury by FOX News (which I hear is has replaced Viagra for worthless, old, white dudes with unremarkable dicks), and they’re demanding a blood sacrifice be made out of people attempting to flee cartel violence all in the name of thy lord and savior Donald J. Trump.

You fucking chuds are pathetic, and the unbelievable amount of nonsense, nay, straight up horseshit you love to spread around like mayonnaise on bologna is appalling, from Robert De Niro mailing himself a pipe bomb, to George Soros funding people like me so I can make fun of chuds like you (thanks, George baby, for all these millions you’ve been sending me... yer boy appreciates it — kisses!) to this “migrant caravan of doom” giving crappy grandmas and shitty grandpas such a case of the heebie-jeebies that they’re celebrating the idea of American military might mowing down a few thousand people who are simply seeking asylum, asylum we could provide with ease.

America could absorb 4,000 migrants without even breaking a sweat, or having Jed Clampett even notice, ‘cause the last thing anyone fleeing their homeland wants is any fucking contact what-so-fucking-ever with some loony tune, MAGA chud with his skull so packed full with lies, hatred and prosperity Christianity that he believes the moon is haunted with the demonic spirit of lizard Karl Marx.

I have abandoned any notions that these chuds will see the error in their hateful ways, and I am certain they’re gonna die spewing reckless nonsense, because reckless nonsense is the very fiber of their being. But, once these old geezers bite the dust, hopefully some form of society will be left for us to right the course and not have MAGA bombers lurking in the shadows, vicious white ladies calling the cops on anyone not named “Brenda” and a racist executing innocent people inside of fucking Kroger grocery stores and houses of worship that don’t exclusively sing the praises of the Nazarene.

The chuds don’t own this country, even if their delusions say otherwise. Everyone of every color, shape, faith and sexual orientation has a right to get them a piece of this here land. And I would rather kick it Southern with anyone from Honduras over any of these so-called red-blooded Americans who are leaning so hard into fascism that they’re about to start wearing air-brushed Mussolini shirts to the tractor pull and setting up surveillance on their own neighbors... just listening for any tidbit that could be seen as a slight to their dear, spray tanned leader so they can snitch in hopes their overlord will drop a treat or two into their dog dish for being the goodest little bootlicker in the bootlicker club.