Video Tapeworm

Jul 22, 2015 at 3:10 pm
White God
White God


KABOUL KITCHEN: SEASON ONE 2012; $39.98; UR No, it’s not another damned reality cooking show! Instead we offer a wildly different comic look at a father and adult daughter during the George Bush era, who come together in a posh free-wheeling enclave of sex and liquor in the heart of devoutly Muslim Kabul, Afghanistan. He owns the titular bar/restaurant; a hidden, hedonistic, anything-goes playground for Westerners, quietly hidden from the restrictions of their host country. All is well until his estranged daughter, an outspoken humanitarian aid worker, comes to live with him. In French with subtitles; stars Gilbert Melki, Stéphanie Pasterkam and a smattering of nudity.

WHITE GOD 2014; $22.98-29.98; R This Cannes Film Festival favorite from Hungary is an unpredictable and uniquely entertaining dystopian treatise on race and totalitarianism, wrapped up in the tail, er tale, of a girl and her dog — ala “Planet Of The Apes!” Curious? You should be, but be warned that this has some disturbing moments; it’s rated “R” for a reason. Little Lilly (first-time actress Zsófia Psotta), goes in search of her best bud after the authorities tell her dad to destroy it, lest it befoul the officially-sanctioned purebred population. The human actors are easily upstaged by the record-setting 274 canines that dominate the cast. You’ll love it.


GHOST TOWN 1988; $17.99-24.99; R Lost amid all the dead-teenager flicks of the Freddy-and-Jason decade, we found this minor old-school horror to be a low-rent breath of fresh air. When winsome blonde soaper Catherine Hickland disappears while driving across the desert, hunky deputy Franc “Sisters” Luz believes she may be in the abandoned, er, ghost town. But little does he suspect that the local rotting residents are still very mobile and under the thrall of an undead outlaw (another soaper, Jimmie F. Skaggs) and his gang of unkillable, unholy savages. Oh, don’t get us wrong, this thing is a royal crapfest, to be sure, but delivers its decaying oatey goodness with panache. Now on Blu-Ray.

MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000: VOLUME XXXIII 2015; $42.98-59.98; UR Two Joel-era movies, two Mike-era movies, new intros, an ode to producer “The Incredible Mr. Lippert,”  a pair of shorts (ooh!), a failed Quinn Martin pilot, and — best of all — Dr. Forester and Frank sing the “Joey The Lemur” song! Okay, most of you have no freakin’ idea what we’re talking about, but for those lucky ones who do, here is a collection of MST3K lesser lights, cut deep from the bosom of America’s greatest indie-TV experiment. The movies include, “King Dinosaur,” a forgotten Christopher Lee Fu Manchu turkey, the TV movie “Code Name: Diamond Head”, and a romantic 1948 B&W oater, “Last Of the Wild Horses” — with a Star Trek riff! Too cool.

NO GAME NO LIFE 2014; $38.98-84.98; UR This thing is a complete mystery: It was one of the most popular animes ever launched, but ends abruptly, without resolving its many plot threads — but no second season is planned! A teen boy and his kid sister are BLANKs, legendary game-players who never reveal their identities, making them the top-guns of the Internet. But such dedication comes at a price, turning them into genius paranoid shut-ins who have lost touch with reality. And when they defeat an opponent named TET, they get sucked into a netherworld where the fate of Humanity rests on their game-playing skills. Great artwork, terrific characters, an immersive plot and surprisingly funny dialogue left us begging for more. A five-disc limited edition Blu-Ray Collector’s Edition retails for $129.98.

THE CHURCHMEN: SEASON ONE 2012; $39.98; UR Better known as “Ainsi Soient-Ils” (“Thy Will Be Done”), this French ensemble TV drama series follows five haunted men from wildly different backgrounds as they begin priesthood training. Wait! Come back! Okay, while the premise seems boring, the men — including a convicted murderer, a rich boy, a criminal and a man grappling with his sexuality — face every temptation and tribulation you can imagine with frustratingly little assist from their supposedly “devine” tutors, themselves little more than forgotten slaves to that crumbling, centuries-old Holy edifice. Features a who’s who of great French actors,

THE WATER DIVINER 2015; $14.96-44.95; R First-time director Russell Crowe does double duty, also starring in this drama set in 1919 Turkey, as the Ozzie father who goes searching for his missing sons, presumed lost in WWI Istanbul, only to discover that everyone in the world has their problems. Statuesque Bond Girl Olga Kurylenko co-stars as a secretive woman with a too-lively son of her own, along with veteran actor Yilmaz Erdogan as the Turkish officer who fought against Crowe’s boys, and may know what happened to them. Watch for several more-familiar faces, including Jai Courtney, and especially the breathtaking Isabel “Red Dawn” Lucas, in lesser roles.

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