Thorns & Roses: The Worst, Best And Most Absurd (1/29/20)

Absurd: ‘Sorta Slots’ — Good,
Casino Gambling — Bad

A Courier Journal story updating Churchill Down’s purchase of Turfway Park last fall included a fascinating nugget that exposes Kentucky’s hypocritical, conflicted relationship with gambling. Forget that the state sanctions, no, celebrates horse racing and that you can throw away our money on the lottery a bazillion ways. If you want to play slot-like machines, look no further than Churchill’s Derby City Gaming on Poplar Level Road. The state (so far) allows only historical racing terminals, which let players bet on replays of horse races. The state does not view them as slots, but… The CJ story says Derby City reported the total amount bet was more than $1 billion during its first 13 months. ”Churchill’s so-called sorta slots were credited with siphoning $20.6 million in monthly slots revenues from Caesars Southern Indiana in the first full month after Derby City opened in September 2018,” the paper said. Turfway will get 1,500 of these games, the CJ reported. But will the intellectually-constipated state legislature allow casino gambling? Nooooooooo! 

Absurd: So…Then, He Really Wasn’t Doing A Crossword Puzzle!

U.S. Sen. Rand Paul was doing a crossword puzzle during the Senate impeachment trial. “All smart people do crossword puzzles,” his spokesman told ABC News. This led us to attempt an exercise in logic: If smart, then…

Absurd: But He Is A Bootlicker

Republican state Sen. Stephen Meredith from Leitchfield withdrew a bill that would have empowered police to stop you, demand your ID and require you to explain what you are doing. He said backlash over the bill included that he was called a “communist, a fascist, a racist, a bootlicker, scum, un-American idiot, an old, wrinkled, white guy, which I obviously can’t deny, but I don’t know it’s anything germane at hand.”

Rose: Oh… High, Dale!

We almost want to retract the criticism we made about Dale Woods, who is WDRB’s president and general manager and who took over for the feckless Bill Lamb. Why? “Let’s be honest,” Woods said in a recent “Point of View,” “Kentuckians are already growing marijuana. It’s time for the state to legitimize the pot industry and start taxing its way to prosperity.”  Video at 4:20.