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So, something weird happened to me, y’all. Last week, I was sitting at my dining table doing something on my laptop and enjoying the sunshine, when I received this text message from a number that wasn’t saved in my phone, “Hey do you still wanna workout later? I’ll have some good for after lol”.
I asked who it was. The name he gave me wasn’t the name of anyone I knew, so I responded with, “I think you have the wrong number, and I’m jealous of whoever this text was really meant for.”
Turns out he was looking for some guy named Matt. He asked me why I was jealous, so I explained that my gym partner was out of town, and I didn’t have any good lined up for the day. We kept texting. I initially assumed he was into Matt, which is why I was being so relaxed and friendly, but then I began to realize he was flirting with me, so I worked my column into the convo, like I do with all dudes so they know there’s a chance their actions might end up in print (case in point). He sent me a pic, and I noticed a car seat in the back. I’m not interested in being on step-mama duty, so that was pretty much a conversation ender for me. Texts dwindled down to nothing. I told him to have a nice workout.
End of story.
Or so I thought.
It was a funny exchange, so I shared our initial few texts on my Instagram story. A friend slid into my DMs to tell me a guy had texted her with the same opening texts on two different occasions over the summer. I sent her his pic. It was the same guy, and he’d sent her the same pic, in addition to a pic of just his torso with his shirt off and another one of him in his underwear, which I presume also did not include his face.
What were the odds?
We both started freaking out.
This was too weird. Then, the next day, another friend slid into my DMs and told me the same thing happened to her too over the summer. We all happen to be black women (and the texter is a late-30s, white man). My two friends don’t know each other. We wondered if he was specifically targeting black women, and we also wondered how he got our phone numbers and whether he knew who we were before he started texting us. Why not just use a dating app? What’s the point in trying to catfish women through phony, wrong number texts? Why use the same texts and use the same selfie with a car seat in the background?
I’m too weirded out to text him to ask him any of these questions, but I felt it necessary to write about this experience to warn anyone else who may get this text. I didn’t meet up with him, so I can’t speak on what his intentions are or what type of person he is but, had someone warned me, I would have played it safe and not responded to his text, and I’m really glad I didn’t arrange to meet him in person. I tried to persuade my brother-in-law to call him from his phone. You know 30-something, white man to 30-something, white man, but he refused to help a sista(-in-law) out.
How prolific of a texter is this guy? How many wrong number text messages is he averaging per month? Has this led to any actual dates? Help me out readers.
If you’ve received this text or one like it, or know more about what’s going on, email me at firstname.lastname@example.org (this is also where you should send me your relationship advice questions and, with it being the holidays, I know you all have got to have a bunch of family-related questions you want to ask me).
Also, a reminder, I partnered up with Austen from Get Read Wednesday (on Facebook and Instagram) for my last column, and we did a live-stream. Austen gave me a tarot reading and drew cards and answered questions from viewers. You can visit my Ask Minda Honey Facebook page (You’ve liked my Facebook page, right? If not, do it and never miss another column) to view the video from the live-stream. You can also send your questions to me as a Facebook message if email isn’t your thing. Remember, I always keep your identity anonymous. •