Two chances to see short-attention-span theater
If you’re in a hurry to learn about American history and the Bible, you’re in luck. Not one, but two “abridged” plays created by the Reduced Shakespeare Company are offered for your amusement and edification this week. Coincidence?
I think not.

First, Alley Theater presents “The Bible — The Complete Word of God, Abridged.” This outrageous comedy runs through Genesis to Revelations in less than two hours. How many readers can say they’ve read the Bible cover to cover? Here’s your chance to get it all while enjoying drink specials. You’ll ponder questions you may never have thought of, like, did Adam and Eve have belly buttons? Fun without blasphemy, some say this show is better than the book. Audiences around the world lap up this good-natured romp through the Good Book. Sounds like a sure winner to me. Check it out at the City Block entertainment complex (133 W. Liberty St., 589-3866) through April 26. Tickets are $16, or $12 for seniors and students.

Next, Assumption High School’s Rose Theatre Company covers 600 years of history in 6,000 seconds in “The Complete History of America (Abridged).” The skits will take you on a fun-filled trip from the New World to New World Order. Imagine “The Daily Show” hosted by The Marx Brothers, and you won’t be far off. Filled with puns, word-association games and parodies, it’s sure to make you smile. The show runs Thursday to Saturday at 7 p.m. at 2170 Tyler Lane. Tickets are $10 for adults, $8 for students and seniors. Call 271-2636. —Sherry Deatrick