This might come as a shock to you, but I don’t cook — I open. My specialties are cans, bottles, jars, bags and Pringles canisters. I don’t mind if other people cook for me, as long as their use of vegetables is limited. My carbon footprint has been fingerprinted and is on the run — which explains the dirty looks I get from hippies near and far. Or maybe it’s just because I shower on a regular basis.
Anyway, what I do love is music … and booze … and puns. So when I heard about the new “Recipe Records” cookbook, which pairs easy-to-make dishes with song lists and punny puns, my interest was piqued. The authors — Lanea Stagg and Maggie McHugh — took their passion for food and rock ’n’ roll and came up with the book. I’ll admit that some of the names are pretty clever — take, for instance, “Blue Suede Stew,” or “Smokies on the Water,” or “Once Bitten Twice Baked Potatoes.” But would this make me pick up a skillet? Probably not.
Lucky for me, there is a short chapter on drinks, titled “The Mosh Pit.” Some of the recipes — gasp! — did not contain alcohol, but anyone who’s ever made hooch knows this is why you should never be without a fifth of Popov. “Girls Just Wanna Have Rum” mixes two kinds of rum, grenadine, lime juice and lemon juice, while “Hair of the Dogs That Bit You” has gin, lemon juice and chili peppers. There’s also a decent recipe for sangría — called “Brandy, You’re A Fine Wine Sangría” — that calls for sugar, brandy and red wine.
After skimming through the book and marking pages for the next person who sets foot in my kitchen, I had a few questions for the authors, namely why there was no mention of Debbie Gibson.
Bar Belle: 205 pages, 169 recipes … and NO mention of Debbie Gibson? What gives?
Maggie & Lanea: Well … we were going to include Debbie Gibson … but it was only in our dreams …
BB: So, what’s your favorite recipe?
M: It’s impossible for me to choose a favorite anything. So, today, my favorite recipe would have to be “Snoop’s Doggy Dog Biscuits” because I’m making my new dog, Dexter, really happy with them.
L: Mine is definitely “Kryptonite,” which is an antipasto that is extremely addicting.
BB: What’s your favorite band?
M: Again, it’s impossible to choose, but as time goes on, it’s clear The Beatles are my favorite band of all time.
L: My favorites change daily … like my appetite. But I know I can always rely on The Beatles to put a smile on my face.
BB: How’d you come up with the song list for each dish?
M&L: It kind of happened randomly … we would see what recipes showed up opposite of each other on a layout and then try to blend them into a song-list theme. For instance, one of our favorite layouts is: “Cinnamon Girl Biscuits” and “In the Donut Holes,” which face each other, and we thought they had kind of a “poor” theme, so we researched songs and came up with a list of “poor songs” — i.e. “Cinnamon Girl” by Neil Young, “30 Days in the Hole” by Humble Pie, “The Poor Side of Town” by Johnny Rivers.
BB: Why do music and eating work so well together?
M&L: We feel like music is therapy — you can be in a cranky mood and put on some Red Hot Chili Peppers or Chuck Berry, and you forget about what’s bringing you down for a few minutes. Since both of us love food and cooking so much, it is only fitting that listening to great music while cooking and eating is a must. We are passionate about both, and this cookbook was a creative way for us to express our respect and joy for great music and food.
Lanea Stagg and Maggie McHugh will be signing copies of “Recipe Records” Thursday, Oct. 21, at Regalo (982 Barret Ave., 583-1798). The “happy hour” includes food samples, and will be held from 5-8 p.m.
Drunk Texts of the Week
• Shes not gay, shes into yoga
• My relationship is on the rocks n theres no whiskey in the glass
• Bourbon opens zippers
• You cant get sunburned in an elevator
• If I were Brett Favre, youd be staring @ my willy right now
• Stompin it out at OUT!